One things my clients have to do when we are working together...

…Is watch the language they use. I don’t mean that they can’t be themselves or say what they want.

But they’re working with me because they want to do something differently. And the way you talk to yourself, about yourself and about your goals can determine whether you’ll reach them or not.

You’re the person that listens to yourself the most and often the way that we speak to ourselves has become a bad habit.

When you say:

“I’ll never find a partner”

You’re reinforcing the belief that you don’t that think you’re enough

“I won’t be good at that promotion”

You’re dismissing yourself before you’ve had a chance to try

“I have to always make sure I’m there for my family”

You don’t create space to have your needs heard

And the less we watch the conversation we’re having with ourselves, the more we create stories that simply aren’t true. You see, when you think you can’t find a partner, you’ll look for information to support this.

You’ll remember the dates that didn’t go well, or the times you didn’t feel enough and soon that story you keep telling yourself, becomes a belief. And your beliefs become your truth.

Or maybe you’re having a hard time at work and your team just don’t seem to understand you. Are you frustrated that they just don’t get it. Do you feel that no-one takes you seriously? Have you remembered the last time you didn’t get results? Or the time they didn’t take on your feedback?

The thing is, when we tell ourself these stories it usually comes from a place of hurt or embarrassment and so we find excuses as to why it’s happened. And this is also means we don’t usually remember them as they actually happened.  We like to add some colour and flare to make ourselves feel better.

But it means that we find evidence that fits our narrative. If you think you’re a terrible leader at work, you’ll find examples and situations to support this thinking

So here’s one thing I want you to do in order to change it….

I want you to challenge the story you’re currently telling yourself. Ask your where are the facts to support this? What evidence do you have that this isn’t true? How are you contributing to this story?

If you want to work together in January, I'll be sharing more details soon for you to talk to me and secure your spot!

I’ve shared this week’s journal prompt, so take 5, grab your phone, a notepad or record your thoughts on an audio and spend time reflecting on this question…

“WHAT STORIES ARE YOU TELLING YOURSELF? WHICH ONES DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE?”

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